I Promise

Uses music to drown out the world
and booze to drown herself
drink the poison
bite the apple
death means numbness
and numbness means peace
try harder, just a bit more
to get people to like you
sleep in one more bed
stare at one more ceiling
with fake stars glowing in the dark
but watch out for the paradox:
they. hate. you.
the more you try for love,
the easier it is to hate.

i hate you
and i hate him
but mostly because,
or only because
i first hated me.

i would burn it all to ashes if i could,
i promise.

9.13.2011